Someone Like You

While I'm downloading Adele's "21" Album, I thought I would write something. I couldn't do anything other than this because downloading slows my internet surfing. So yeah, I'm here typing down anything and everything that's running inside my mind right now. Welcome to my fickle and chaotic brain. I think my neurons (medical term for brain cells) are kind of crashing against each other because I can't seem to organize my thoughts. However, this is not your anatomy subject so I'll talk about what's playing on my iTunes application as of this moment instead. The song is called Someone Like You by Adele. Well, I heard this one several times for like 3 weeks now but today is the first time I learned to appreciate it. You can google the lyrics (grins). I saw its video on YouTube and Adele said the message of the song goes something like she's imagining that she's 40 years old and she sees her ex-boyfriend happily married with someone else. She, on the other hand, is alone. Well it taught me one thing - always think about the decisions you're going to make when it comes to relationships because one day, you might regret what you did or didn't do. When we are mad, we have this tendency to suggest a break-up (I plead guilty you honor.) I have a problem with regards to handling my anger towards my boyfriend. When I'm pissed, I immediately ask him to go away like I don't ever want to see him again - for good. But later on, when the anger had faded, I'll regret it. And I don't know but I guess I'm just lucky enough that none really left for good. Maybe they knew me too well that they think I'm just mad that's why I asked for a break-up. I know I have to change that attitude because maybe one day, I get to meet the one for me and then we would argue and then I would suggest a break-up and then he'd take it seriously and really leave me and then the anger would subside BUT he's already gone and I can do nothing about it anymore. So the next time I'd get mad,silent treatment will do I guess. 

Since I'm blabbing about the song, I'm going to quote my favorite line/s. Well, it's the chorus. Isn't it always the best part? It goes something like:

Nevermind I'll find someone like you.

I wish nothing but the best for you too.

"Don't forget me," I begged.

"I'll remember," you said.

Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead.

Just listening to her sing, I could feel pain in my heart like it happened to me too. It's just funny how life plays with us. One day you're both happy, the next day it's over. You don't know what's going to happen next. You could just wish that the butterflies you're feeling and the happiness your special someone is giving you would last longer and hopefully would never ever end. But then at the back of your mind, you should know that nothing is permanent in this world. And that some people are just meant to fall in love but aren't meant to be together. Sad, I know, but we can't control it. The best solution? Seize every moment and save every happy memory. And always bear in mind that when God takes away someone from you, He's going to give you someone better.

Adele has other awesome songs too by the way.

So Near Yet So Far (A Letter To The One I Lost)

Dear You,

You probably wouldn't be able to read this but I'm writing anyway. Months or years from now, I'll look back and this letter will serve as a reminder of the time when you happened. I know this is over, I'm quite unsure if we even started in the first place. But those months when my world just revolved around you, I felt loved. Distance might have been our greatest obstacle, but we held on for almost 7 months. And those months, you made me the happiest girl in the world. Nothing compares to the "love" we both shared. You were not beside me but your voice was enough to make me feel safe. You proved me wrong when I thought princes only exists in fairytales. You cared for me too much. And I cared for you the same. Until now, honestly, I still do. As I'm making this, I'm worrying about how you'd be when I'm gone. Wondering if someone would come along and treat you the way I did or better. It kills me to say this but I really hope you'll find the one for you, even if at the back of my mind I want it to be me. But you gave up. You got tired of waiting. And I can't blame you. Maybe if I was there and you were here and you're the one coming, I'd get tired too. Or maybe I won't because I know you're worth it. And right now, I'm reading all of your comments on my profiles. What happened to us? We were so sweet then. All I could do now is just save the happy things we shared. Someday soon, I'll get over this. But I'll never forget how real this was. Far more real than all my real life relationships. I wish I could just hug you right now. But I know that if I can, I wouldn't be able to say goodbye. I hope you'd always keep yourself safe and remember all the stuff your own personal nurse told you. I love you. Like I didn't love anyone before. Thank you for the memories. Thank you for making me the center of your world. Thank you for making me laugh and yeah for making me cry too. And I'm really really sorry for everything I did that caused you pain. You didn't deserve that. You're a good man - just in a wrong place. I wish you the best in life. And as I've always said, stay the same. I hope you'll be happy. I love you. Goodbye.


Still Loving You,
Me

If Only

(a poem I made in 3rd year college for my ex-boyfriend)

If only you listened when I had to talk

If only you held my hand when we walked

If only you've shown me that you'll always care

If only you did, then I'd still be there

If only you wiped my tears when I cried

If only you believed that I never lied

If only you knew it's only you that I see

If only you did, then you'd still have me

If only you suffered the pain I felt

If only you noticed that your stare made me melt

If only you asked if I was okay

If only you did, I'd never go away

If only you were aware of the right things to say

If only you said you love me in every possible way

If only you never did me no harm

Then I might never have ended in someone else's arms.

 

Personal Poems

A floral gift wrapper, an old notebook, a pair of scissors and a roll of adhesive - all I need are these materials and poof, I have my journal. I used to do this a lot, I mean I have like 8 journals since high school. I have a separate diary - the one with a lock. My journals are for random thoughts and some short poems I make whenever I feel like it. While I was cleaning my cabinet last night, I found some of my journals. I will share the poems I made before. 

I Love You Still

No matter how you hurt me
No matter how I feel
No matter what everyone may say
I know I love you still


I know I hated you before
And I do up to now
Because you broke my heart in two
But I still love you somehow

Now I'll step into reality
That you're not meant for me
But I know that I love you still
Whatever it may be

Now I'll be crying everynight
And I always will
Because even though I let you go
Deep inside I love you still

 Just A Friend

I love it when he smiles at me
In this world, it's only him I see
My heart skips a beat when he calls my name
I always wish he'd stay the same

I like the way he checks if I'm alright
And if I'm the last person he texts at night
My world stops turning when he holds my hand
The sensations I feel never seem to end

 So I went to tell him how I feel
That I care for him and my love is real
But the spark faded and everything came to and end
When he spoke these words "..but you're just a friend"

Goodbye 

We were so inlove
And it felt so strong
You said you'd never leave me
I don't know what went wrong

You were suddenly cold
You didn't care at all
You avoided me
You didn't answer my calls

I finally made myself believe
That things will never be the same as before
Tears still fall when I remember you saying
"Sorry, I don't love you no more."

 

5 Places I Want To Visit

1. Paris 

Aside from wanting to see the Eiffel Tower, I want to go to Paris because it's one of the top fashion capitals of the world. Also, there are so many historical landmarks there. And the french cuisine. And not to mention it's the City Of Love. :)

2. England

For me, England has the most beautiful architecture.  The castle-like buildings are just so uhm royal to look at. And I'm a sucker for princess-related stuff. LOL Their love for the arts are also fascinating. And the ACCENT! omg! need I say more?

3. Socotra Island, Yemen

Found in the Indian Ocean, they call it the most alien-looking place on earth. There's a  tree on the island that looks like a big mushroom. And most plants look weird. It's kind of interesting in a way.

4. Hawaii

Yes yes I'm a beach bum! And I think Hawaii has the best beaches in the world. It's like paradise in there.

5. Maldives

It's the lowest country in the world, so I  before the island sinks, I need to visit it. LOL